The time has come.
Best of the best.
It’s finally here.
I am going to assume many of you guessed this would be #1. If you didn’t, well, now you know. Don’t forget it. This is important.
I LOVE HOT TODDIES.
The hot toddy is a wonderful drink. First of all, what a great name! Second of all, it cures illnesses! And third of all, it tastes absolutely delicious! (Yes, I know you may be skeptical about that second point, but I swear it’s true. Drink a hot toddy when you have a bad cold or flu and you will feel better instantly. I wouldn’t lie about this. I do it a lot.)
Honestly, there isn’t much else to say. It’s such a wonderful drink. And fortunately, toddies are so simple to make! And so, dear friends, I will share my recipe with you. So that you, too, can experience the joy that is hot toddies at Christmastime.
What you’ll need:
- Hot (boiling) water
- Slice of lemon
How to make it:
First, boil some water. Admire your other ingredients as you do so.
Next, pour some bourbon in your glass. About one finger should do the trick. (Now don’t freak out, you whiskey drinkers. One finger is PLENTY, I promise. Mugs are much larger than rocks glasses, so it’s more than you’d get in a bar.)
[Side note: If you don’t know what a finger is, look up “finger of whiskey” on Google. Then click the top Wikipedia link. Those sentences will sound a lot less dirty if you know what I’m talking about.]
This is the part where most people make their mistake. So pay close attention, because this will be the difference between an alright hot toddy and an amazing hot toddy.
Get a spoon (like, your average table spoon…and no, not a Tablespoon.) Fill the spoon with honey, like so:
Then, carefully and slowly, pour the boiling water over the spoon into the mug. Basically what you’re trying to do is get the honey to melt as you pour the water over it. Once there’s no more honey left on the spoon, leave it in the mug as you pour in the rest of the water to fill it up.
Now use that spoon to stir. STIR. Stir it up. Little darlin’. [Omitting this step could be disastrous. If the honey stays on the bottom, the first sips will be straight whiskey, and the last ones will be straight honey. The mark of a good drink is consistency. Not how thick or runny it is, but how consistent the flavor is throughout.]
Almost there now! Take that lemon slice, squeeze it lightly over the drink, and then just drop it in. And there you go! A perfectly lovely hot toddy. Good for the soul, and great for the common cold.
And so, dear friends, those are my 12 Drinks of Christmas. Enjoy, and Merry Christmas to all! (And to all a drunk night.)