I want to drink all of the beer at Brouwer’s.

Yup, you heard me. All of it. I want to drink all of it.

This is that bar that’s kind of nice and classy, not super loud or sporty, pretty mellow and chill most of the time. And yet all I want to do is get completely and totally plastered there.

Now don’t get the wrong idea. I’m not trying to go crazy or party hard or be drunk and belligerent. I simply have the overwhelming desire to consume every beer on the menu because they are THAT GOOD. And in doing so, I’m pretty sure I’d end up wasted and lying on the floor. But in the most positive way possible, I swear.

DSCN1571Just look at all of those taps!!

Brouwer’s Cafe, located in Fremont, is what one might like to refer to as a Belgian beer bar, but that’s really not doing it justice. Yes, they do feature a nice list of Belgian beers on draught, which is often not an easy thing to find (out of 64 taps, 12 of them are Belgians). And yes, they also feature Belgian-inspired eats, such as moules frites and stoofvlees (Belgian stew).

So yes, it’s a Belgian beer bar.

BUT WAIT. There are 52 more taps completely unaccounted for, and I want to drink all of these beers too! The majority of these (probably 16) are Washington beers. Then there’s a good chunk from Oregon and California, a smattering from the east coast, a couple English/German/Dutch brews, and a handful of ciders.

DSCN1575

If I could afford it (and could succeed in this endeavor without dying), I would actually spend a whole week at Brouwer’s trying every beer on the menu. The flaw in this plan is that the menu is ever-rotating, so pretty much I’d be there forever.

BUT IT WOULD BE AMAZING.

In addition to having ALL of the beer, it’s also just a really chill spot. The room is big, with a vaulted ceiling and two balconies with additional seating. The lighting is dark and it sort of feels like the inside of an old castle (there is a gargoyle type thing sitting on one of the balconies).

Although I have designs to go back and drink all day and night and forever, I did enjoy my first visit immensely. I tried three very different beers:

  • A Black Session Lager from Full Sail Brewing (Hood River, OR) –> dark color, malty, but light and pretty low ABV
  • The Trip XV Buckwheat Saison, a collaboration between New Belgium Brewing (CO) and Elysian Brewing (WA) –> looked like the blackness, tasted like grains (but in a really good way…not sure how to make that sound good but it was AWESOME)
  • The Trifecta IPA from Fremont Brewing (Seattle) –> apparently this is Brouwer’s house IPA, and it’s really quite good.

I also shared some frites with my friend Mark. When you order frites, they ask what dipping sauce you would like. We glanced at the menu and without a second thought ordered the Bourbon dragon sauce. Because, duh.

DSCN1572Do you see how small that print is?! That’s how many beers they have ON DRAUGHT.

Oh, and did I mention the back of the draught list has a pretty extensive whiskey list? And by extensive, I mean that they have all of the scotch.

Oh, did I also mention that their bottle list is SO BIG that they keep it in a special laminated binder-type thing because it’s too long for just one page? Yeah. Seriously. They have 300 fucking bottles. 300 BOTTLES.

I could probably live there and never feel the need to leave and discover new beers. Because they do all the discovering for you! All you need to do is go drink it.

And, well, drinking is my specialty. So really this is a match made in heaven. Brouwer’s, I think I’m ready to take the next step. Let’s do this.

*************

[Next time, on Christina’s drinking adventures: How many different things can I wrap in bacon?!?]

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